Popular U.S. relationship columnist gets a female reader’s advice on what makes a good man’s online dating profile.

Saw this the other day and thought many guys might benefit from it. “Dear Abby“, is a syndicated newspaper column that’s been around forever, but we men can’t argue that the lady reader’s suggestions aren’t good.

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MEN POSTING PROFILES ON DATING SITES COULD USE A FEW TIPS
By Abigail Van Buren
June 17, 2014 1:00 AM
Dear Abby

DEAR ABBY: May I sit in your chair and give some advice today? It’s aimed at men who place ads on dating sites and then wonder why they can’t meet “quality” women.

I’m an educated, decent-looking, middle-aged widow who has dated quite a lot through such ads and local social groups. Yes, it can be a jungle out there, but the Internet is a wonderful tool for bringing people together.

I live in a small town, and the pool of eligible men is smaller here than in metropolitan areas. That said, there are few profiles that attract my attention and that of my divorced/widowed friends.

Gentlemen, some pointers:

1. Smile! A dour expression is unpleasant.

2. We may want to see you with your shirt off after we get to know you, but it’s not the most appealing or refined pose for a first look.

3. Be realistic. If you are Joe Average, we Jane Averages would enjoy meeting you. Are you really going to hold out for a model who is a decade or so younger than you?

4. Be kind to the English language. You don’t have to be a genius, but it would be nice to know you can competently communicate in writing.

5. Consider a shave. Some women like men with facial hair; the majority of the ones I know do not. About 75 percent of men over 50 have a mustache, beard or both. What are you hiding under there?

6. If you’re married and miserable, for goodness sake, go for marriage counseling or get a divorce. But please don’t deceive women who want to meet a nice guy to share life with.

In case you think I’m being too harsh, we gals welcome any suggestions from men who scroll through those female profiles looking for love. — SURFING IN PETERSBURG, ILL.

DEAR SURFING: I’m printing your letter, and I’m sure the reaction will be interesting. The No. 1 complaint I’ve heard about Internet dating has to do with misrepresentation on both sides of the gender divide.

Full article.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What do “tigers” have to do with online dating?

Tiger_Profiles

Evidently, at least in the United States, many guys have started adding photos of themselves, posing with a tiger, to their online dating profiles.

The Wall Street Journal reports there’s been an big increase of tigers in men’s profiles on online dating websites.  Whether the idea is to just be different, suggest he’s well traveled, a brave guy or something else, the use of tigers in online dating profiles seems to be reaching almost epidemic levels, with more and more big cats showing up in profiles of guys hoping to connect.

Now, we recognize everyone wants to stand out in their online dating profile, seem special and different…in a good way. However, if you’re using a tiger photo to juice up your appeal, and a large a large number of competing profiles are too, then the risk is you seem to be “just one of the guys,” and worse, lacking any real creativity. Then again, if you are a safari hunter in Africa, maybe it works.

In the Wall Street Journal article, one female user of a dating site reported the more tigers she saw online, the less original the photos seemed. She now compares tiger photos with writing “I love to laugh” on a dating profile—a cliché and, for her, an automatic rejection.

Our advice is it goes to show that you need to make your online profile uniquely and sincerely about YOU, not the photo set, props, or location. And maybe, just maybe, that means less is more.

Then again, it doesn’t seem that elephants are being used much in online dating profiles … yet!