Why are there so many scammers in online dating?

Gee, maybe it’s because there are so many gullible victims there.

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It’s a well known fact that online dating is full of scammers, dishonest people trying to get money or just wasting your time with their fake profiles or playing on your emotions with insincere romantic promises. OK, so there are many people on online dating who are dishonest, a little or a lot, but why? What are the reasons?

Reason # 1

One of the big reasons for much of online dating dishonesty is how easy it is for people to disguise and misrepresent their physical selves on the internet. That tall, handsome man’s profile could really be a short, fat guy. Same for the beautiful lady: she could could be very physically unattractive… or worse, a man! Everybody wants to look good, so what’s wrong with a photo that’s out of date or has been “slightly” photo shopped? Hmmm, I wonder.

Reason # 2

Another reason that attracts dishonest people to online dating is that it’s a great way to actually live out “other dimension” fantasies and construct whole “other” lives they can share and talk about with online contacts. Their victims have no idea what they’re learning about the other person is all made up.

Now, I’m not a mountain climber, nor do I want to be (I’m afraid of heights!), but I guess maybe once I connected with someone online, I could tell them I climbed Mount Everest (but didn’t have the photos and would show them some other time). Or maybe tell them I was a military veteran, decorated for bravery, but really didn’t want to talk about it. The false lives and lies to support them can be big or small, but they are limited only by the imagination and creativity of the dishonest people.

Reason # 3

However, the most serious dishonesty operating in online dating comes from those scammers seeking money or worse. (Remember, there are criminals and sex offenders lurking online.) The reason these types are busy hunting on online dating sites is that so many online daters are emotionally vulnerable and easy to be taken advantage of. Many of these “victims” turn to online dating , because they’re just coming out of a relationship, marriage, etc. They are scared, hopeful, maybe desperate to find that perfect someone for them. And they are super vulnerable for the “pros,” who are just cruising the internet like sharks looking for them.

And that brings us to the example below.

A scary “scammer” story and proof that some people just don’t learn

An Australian man spent more than $20,000 funding scam artists he thought were in love with him, now has plans to propose to his girlfriend in the Philippines, whom he believes is the real thing.

I’m not making this up!  And I’m using this example to show how people how people can get scammed MULTIPLE TIMES, and still believe in online dating.

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The young Aussie is Ben Ivey. He’s 32 years old, looks normal and has been scammed out of    $20,000 by three women over three years.

The reason he gives is his emotional vulnerability at the time: “I think the reason why I got  scammed three times was because of my loneliness and I just wanted to have someone to  love  and I was prepared to do what I could to make the women happy.”

The scammers are smart, and know how to play on a person’s weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Ben said, “Every time they asked me for money, I told them about the previous scammer and how upset I was by that, but they assured me it wouldn’t happen again. I believed every time this would come true, but it didn’t.”

Now he AGAIN thinks he’s found his perfect partner online and is going to the Philippines to meet her and her family. We’ll probably never know if there’s a good ending to his online search, but we know for sure his story is a good illustration of what happens when expert scammers catch a victim they can take great advantage of.

For the full article.

Hope you’ve enjoyed this post and maybe learned some things from it. Remember, the best way to protect yourself from online dating scammers, is to use a reputable matchmaking agency like us, at Asian Western Love.

Please visit us here and follow us on Twitter @asianwesternlov

 

 

 

 

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Popular U.S. relationship columnist gets a female reader’s advice on what makes a good man’s online dating profile.

Saw this the other day and thought many guys might benefit from it. “Dear Abby“, is a syndicated newspaper column that’s been around forever, but we men can’t argue that the lady reader’s suggestions aren’t good.

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MEN POSTING PROFILES ON DATING SITES COULD USE A FEW TIPS
By Abigail Van Buren
June 17, 2014 1:00 AM
Dear Abby

DEAR ABBY: May I sit in your chair and give some advice today? It’s aimed at men who place ads on dating sites and then wonder why they can’t meet “quality” women.

I’m an educated, decent-looking, middle-aged widow who has dated quite a lot through such ads and local social groups. Yes, it can be a jungle out there, but the Internet is a wonderful tool for bringing people together.

I live in a small town, and the pool of eligible men is smaller here than in metropolitan areas. That said, there are few profiles that attract my attention and that of my divorced/widowed friends.

Gentlemen, some pointers:

1. Smile! A dour expression is unpleasant.

2. We may want to see you with your shirt off after we get to know you, but it’s not the most appealing or refined pose for a first look.

3. Be realistic. If you are Joe Average, we Jane Averages would enjoy meeting you. Are you really going to hold out for a model who is a decade or so younger than you?

4. Be kind to the English language. You don’t have to be a genius, but it would be nice to know you can competently communicate in writing.

5. Consider a shave. Some women like men with facial hair; the majority of the ones I know do not. About 75 percent of men over 50 have a mustache, beard or both. What are you hiding under there?

6. If you’re married and miserable, for goodness sake, go for marriage counseling or get a divorce. But please don’t deceive women who want to meet a nice guy to share life with.

In case you think I’m being too harsh, we gals welcome any suggestions from men who scroll through those female profiles looking for love. — SURFING IN PETERSBURG, ILL.

DEAR SURFING: I’m printing your letter, and I’m sure the reaction will be interesting. The No. 1 complaint I’ve heard about Internet dating has to do with misrepresentation on both sides of the gender divide.

Full article.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In online dating it’s not good to catch a “Catfish.”

The highly respected United States reference resource, the Merriam-Webster Collegiate® Dictionary, has added new words for 2014, including catfish “a term that refers to a person who sets up a false social networking profile for deceptive purposes”. To be included in the dictionary’s annually announced new content, a word must be used and understood by a significant number of people.

catfish

Gee, if a lot of people using online dating services know and understand this new word, it probably means there’s a problem, don’t you think?