How do you know when it’s the real thing?


I read an interesting, but short piece the other day by P. David Hornik. He set out his ideas as to what a relationship should have, if it’s going to be truly long lasting … perhaps, even, forever (as most all of us may be seeking!).

Hornik’s indicators are simple, and perhaps somewhat expected, but it’s nice to have another person confirm what we all should either know or suspect is necessary for that “REAL RELATIONSHIP.”

1. It ought to be fun. This one’s easy. If a relationship isn’t “fun,” why are you in it. No, it doesn’t have to be fun all the time, but if it’s not fun more time than not, you better be going….somewhere else, unless you are some kind of masochist.

2. No “excessive” demands. OK, everyone has their own “requirements,” “requests” …who knows, but a “demanding” relationship can get pretty heavy, pretty fast. Monitor the demands you each make on each other, VERY carefully.

3. Do you both “fit.” This one’s easy. Do you both easily go together. No, you can be different and like different things, but if you just feel happy together, you’ll know you’ve got a good “fit.”

4.  Accept each other. This kind of goes with the “fit” above in #3 and it’s a good suggestion for our everyday lives. When this don’t go your way, or obstacles come up, breathe deeply and try to accept what’s going on. No guarantees, but it just might help.

Well, that’s all for now. It’s not brain surgery. Maybe there’s a nugget or two in here that will make you more confident (or scared) about the relationship you’re in.

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